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Mrs. Monk's Would-be Diary should have been written by Mrs. Monk, since she is the "Writer" in the family.
However, since she is a writer only in the conceptual sense, I have undertaken to fill these pages on her behalf
If not by her, these pages will certainly be about her, and other important matters of the day         Leslie Monk





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29 Nov 2015


Andy Murray’s

Davis Cup Year

The Final Point, the match point that won the Davis Cup for GB was classic Murray featuring ferocious crosscourt rallies astonishing "gets" and a winning defensive lob from the baseline.

David Goffin was a stubborn opponent on his favourite surface, and not the David Goffin overwhelmed by Murray in Paris just two weeks ago.

Murray had to work hard for the victory and his emotional release at the end was palpable as he collapsed and rolled tearfully in the clay.

Team-mates led by Leon Smith collapsed over him to celebrate his and their achievement.

Murray had the presence of mind to force himself away from his team-mates in order to shake the hand of Goffin and in turn each of the Belgian team.

This may be the most moving moment of Murray's career and one which epitomises the character of the man.

#murray #daviscup

25 November 2015

Cameron's failure to reply to Corbyn's six questions about taxcredits, and his grilling on police numbers, suggests  that his questions lead to a change of government policy, double U-turns , climb down x 2, but no apology.

Laura they-call-it-journalism Kuenssberg would not fail to put a Tory spin on a jam sandwich.

Her considered view is Labour  is now disadvantaged because they now have nothing to complain about.

Bring back Nick Robinson

24 November 2015

Respect the humour of the Belgians and the pussy cat festival of defiance.

Je suis Cat Flap Charlie

Je suis Paris

Je suis Rene Magritte

22 November 2015

Kuenssberg’s Killer Question


When is it right to kill many good men in order to kill one bad man? LW111

#Sorrel #Lawson #Kuenssberg #Corbyn #Clark

21 November 2015

Leigh On Sea

recent pictures

#Leigh #Shoestringonline #Essex

18 November 2015

Bully Boys

Whatever you might think about the exchange of personal insults between Ken Livingstone and Kevan Jones, the fact that the news and political news agenda was obsessed with this and not the political differences that divided them will frustrate anyone who voted for Corbyn. Trident is an issue that deserves a debate.

David Cameron was faced today with the PMQs regarding Tory police officer cuts, and simply replied that he had increased numbers of police officers by 500%. Did he misunderstand the question?

Twitter feeds are however full of rudeness about Cameron's lies.

Being rude to political opponents is not exactly foreign to David Cameron and now it seems Conservative Central Office is blind to far more serious bullying closer to home. 

Conservative leadership knew of bullying in youth wing for years, claims Tory MP

12 November 2015

My First Car


Lady Chatterley’s Lover and Princess Margaret, Potted Plants and Harold Macmillan’s Wind of Change.

#Austin #Beatles #Magistrates #Justice #1964

Five Year Ago

11 November 2010


Exotic topless girls in Tottenham Court Road.

#pubity #Gaugin #topless

9 November 2015

I learn today that a Burmah election requires a 67% mandate of the electorate and also the final approval of a military junta. Cameron claims that his 23.5 %  of the May electorate is a clear mandate for him to do as he pleases until 2020.

The Junta in Burmah claims 25% of power without a single vote cast for them, more than Cameron achieved with all those porkies.

Junta envy!

Today, Cameron was embarrassed by two protesters heckling him at the CBI like Tory back benchers at PMQs. Cameron suffered for a moment with even more Junta envy!

How did they get in, Cameron was thinking.

How did Cameron get in, I am thinking.

 #Cameron #JuntaEnvy

9 November 2015

Ai Weiwei

The show that made us renew our subscription with  the Royal Academy. They lost our patronage when they went crazy with the pricing and now they have seen the error of their ways. Our small protest is not exactly on the scale of sacrifice made by Ai Weiwei.

8 November 2015



The sculpture was found by chance in Wat Tyler Country Park, off the Thames estuary in Pitsea, Essex, UK. I can find no information on the artist but the towering group of figures seem to resonate with Rodin's The Burghers of Calais (Les Bourgeois de Calais).
The grim social housing towers on the mean streets of nearby Southend are known for some desperate poverty related suicides. Some politicians are blind to poverty and only have eyes for the sacred deficit created by elite bankers.

 #Cameron #Poverty #Corbyn

Revenge of the Telephobic Revisited

This story found itself in the most read category this last month and this may be because Mrs. Monk has been pushing it on Twitter, or it may be to do with the government announcing new laws to deal with Cold Calling.

Not before time.

#coldcalling #telephobic


31 October 2015

Halloween Cat Revisited

“There, I hope you are satisfied,” she said, “No pumpkins.”

#Halloween #Cat #Dog

25 October 2015

Martin Amis has a wonderful sense of humour and likes dressing up clutching his degree from  the Polytechnic of Pomposity.

 #Amis #Corbyn #Snob #Arrogant

24 October 2015

Dave's  Democracy

How many of the 23.5% would have voted Tory had they known the truth?

#NHS #Cameron #Democracy #Corbyn

23 October 2015


Cuckoo Art

This would be where you might find homespun "music" created by Monks, aka Cuckoo Spit.
These Videos refer to the Art World in some way or another.

Art is usually about Art.

Sad but true.

22 October 2015

Dave's Democracy

In David Cameron's first term he was inconvenienced by the repeated reminders of his pledge not to interfere with the NHS. The "no top down reorganisation" promise was the big fat stand out lie amongst all the other lies that got him elected.

This second time around Dave will have to listen to frequent references to his pledge not to reduce tax credits and which is now exposed as yet another lie.

Corbyn's call for less abusive debate during PMQs and elsewhere is unravelling fast, because Dave just cannot help himself to do the right thing.

Grabbing power with lies and a 23.5 % mandate is pantomime democracy. Why would the 76.5 % majority of the electorate who did not ask for these policies in May, tolerate this shameful abuse of power?

And yes, how many of the 23.5 % would have voted Tory had they known the truth?

#NHS #Cameron #Democracy #Corbyn

Leigh On Sea

recent pictures

6 October 2015

Dear George Osborne

Thank you for your email today.

You begin with “could not be clearer”

If I can predict so clearly what you might say then it is pretty obvious that what you might say is not what you think but what a committee of conservatives have told you to think and that you are not the thinker you aspire to be.

Sorry to embarrass you in this way but what you say is a crock.

#gove #smug #tory #osborne

5 October 2015

Could not be clearer?

Why is the Tory audience in Manchester applauding a Chancellor who cannot do simple arithmetic.

The Tory conference speakers have all been told to lead with assertions that they have an “historic” mandate from the British Public to do as they please. Gove's triumphalism was laid on thick with layers of congealed BS. Osborne today likewise claimed the British public had made their wishes clear, and that much "could not be clearer".

I beg to differ.  The 23.5% electoral mandate the Tories achieved is not a majority that any democrat would or should ever recognise.

If the Tories doubled their mandate it still would not be a majority of the electorate.


the little number that refuses to be a majority because it is too damn little

#gove #smug #tory

Goldfish named Colin should also take note.

Top Story Trending This Last Month.

The Hard Disc

GPs follow procedures informed by a computer programme #alzheimers #NeverForget #NHS

27 September 2015


#serpentine #pavilion #architecture

We have struggled to get into London this Summer, but somehow  made it to the Serpentine Pavilion before it is removed 18th October. This year the pavilion was designed by Spanish born architects José Selgas and Lucía Cano, "selgascano." This is what we found.


Toxic Tories

Addenbrooke’s “failure” is proof that Toxic Tories are bad for your health.

23 September 2015

Shelfies and Selfies

Is it possible that a Shelfie is more revealing than a Selfie? This set of Pictures examines this profound question.

Warts and all Work in Progress.

21 September 2015

Hello Dave

I happen to find pigs irresistible, but not in that way. There, I said it.

Sorry about all the Porkie references on the Hippo pages. No offence!

I was of course referring to your failure to tell the complete truth and all that political misrepresentation, and not at all to any alleged dark side which is none of my business.


Beware of Tory donors with deep pockets is my advice.

And of the stupid infantile Tory youth, far too keen to ingratiate and defend you in such great detail, as if they were there,.... when you did IT, allegedly. Very strange that they would drop you in it in this way.

#Mensch  #Toby

Impressive timing by Lord Ashcroft, you have to admit that such deep pockets can achieve so much revenge. Empty pockets and you are fucked.



Mr Corbyn will be kind to you.

That is your only hope.

Jeremy Corbyn.

#Dave #Porkies #Piggate

20 September 2015

Dog Dreams

Uncheesy dreams of old dogs, Corbyn and Charlie.

#dream #Corbyn #dog

14 Sep 2015

 Eric, the Vulgar Gnome

The “Compassionate Conservative” David Cameron has failed to impress Eric on this and all occasions.

More Eric and other political images.

Politics and Conflict.

13 Sep 2015

Conservative Campaign HQ have also sent me a Fascist-like Graphic hostile to Jeremy Corbyn.

It is quite clear that Warmongers and Scaremongers do not like Jeremy Corbyn.

12 Sep 2015

PMQS’ dream first question.

JC wrote to me today and asked me to suggest a question for David Cameron.

My suggestion as follows....

David Cameron, the people that elected me the leader of the Labour Party want to know what you meant, 5 years ago by promising that those with the “broadest shoulders” would bear the greatest burden of austerity.”

Did you intend to make the poorest poorer and the “broadest shoulders”  to have a lesser burden today, 5 years later?

David Cameron will then answer with a prepared list of Tory “achievements” unrelated to the question.

JC should then refer the matter to the speaker and politely demand an appropriate answer.

Mr Corbyn has a significant mandate to change Westminster.

Mr Cameron has a 23.5% mandate to represent the UK..


 11 September

Unhappy Anniversary

Postcard from Oblivion

8 Sep 2015




The word has caught on and is clearly intended to be pejorative and intended to undermine Jeremy Corbyn. See above for Gideonomics


Below are the lyrics for a song in need of a tune.


George Osborne, the Tory blight

Liz Kendal, the Tory light

Cameron and Tony Blair

Won the day, but lost the year.


Find a fault in Jeremy 

So why not blame the BBC.


"Corbynomics" are absurd

Not a brand but a brand new word.


Yvette Cooper, Tory light.

JC says to make it right

Andy may Burnup the fight.

Before the dawn into the night


Gideon, the Tory Blight

God forbid the Tory Light 

Cameron and Tony Blair

May win the day but lose the year.


"Corbynomics" are absurd

Not a brand

 But a brand new word.

One Year ago George Osborne wrote to me thinking I was a Tory. This page continues to be read on these pages.

hard working privileges

29 September 2014

Pride and Privilege.

Osborne’s contrary rhetoric.


11 Aug 2015

Cuckoo Art

This new Vimeo Channel would be where you might find homespun "music" created by Monks. aka Cuckoo Spit. These music videos refer to the Art World in some way or another.




subscribe, no charge...

Love is a very splendid thing. A movie called "Love" was created by us Monks at Shoestringonline. We then discovered that there were 10,729 movies on vimeo with the same title. Most seem to be syrup, or church, or just bad, or all three. Surely there would be enough to start a Love Channel. Love Channel was born, or was there already a Love Channel. Apparently not.

Recent Pictures of London

By Sara Monk, Pictures are added and subtracted from this collection from time to time.

Selected By Others

These pictures were chosen, for whatever reason, by readers of these pages and not by the editor, nor the photographer, usually Mrs Monk.



Items designed to be useful or important for only a short time and/or occasionally embedded with prescient significance.

Photos by Sara Monk.


1 April  2015


This was recorded one April Fools' Day. I have no idea where it came from. It was just a bit of spontaneous foolishness. Music Recorded circa 2008.


subscribe if you please


1.derogatory  ( Brit ) a musician, esp a pop musician, regarded as being overconcerned with technique rather than musical content or expression
2.( Austral ) any musician, esp a professional one



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3 Most Read Stories  last 30 Days as follows...  

The Hard Disc

GPs follow procedures informed by a computer programme #alzheimers #NeverForget #NHS

12 December 2009

Revenge of the Telephobic Revisited

#coldcalling #telephobic

17 March  2015

Goldfish AV and Amnesia

A fish called Colin

3 Most Read Stories   last 12 Months..  as follows...

12 March 2013

The Filthy Rich


make the "market economy",  look extremely foolish.

 22 March 2015

NHS For Sale

The Special relationship and  where money is the object.

The Untouchables

27 June 2013

George Osborne would rather choke on a pheasant than......

Other Popular Stories  last 12 Months..  as follows...  

hard working privileges

29 September 2014

Pride and Privilege.

Osborne’s contrary rhetoric.

18 May 2015

Toxic Tories

So why are Tories so determined to find fault with the NHS?

6 Aug 2015

Corbyn and The Processed Peas

Jeremy Corbyn is uniquely able to oppose the Tories.#Corbyn  #ProcessedPeas #BrianEno

The Water Cooler

The Paul Daniels, so called out-loud by the nurse, is not the famed diminutive conjurer married to Debbie McGee..........

All Legal

4 December 2012

"It is all legal, look at the rules book."

7 June 2015

Professional Tennis Fouls

The Novak Djokovic character flaws are not disguised by his PR smile. We don’t buy it.


24 September 2009

Revenge of The Telephobic

a surreal conversation with a lady salesperson, selling indeterminate goods.

31 MARCH 2014

Tory DNA

So clever of the Chancellor to bribe pensioners with their own money.

24 Sep 2013

Stifled Spin

You will have heard Ed Balls volunteer to have his spending pledges assessed by the Treasury.

Vocation or Vacation

15 December 2013

MP’s PAY, a free lunch and a subsidised bar.

Last Year’s Foodbank Christmas Card

David Cameron is still in denial and has turned down  £100s of Millions of  EU Cash for Foodbanks . Cameron wants to be seen fighting for EU money but he does not want it for the UK poor.

21 August 2014

Tory Mugs for Mugs

Grant Shapps, You’ve made my day.

3 April 2010

Farmville Meat is Murder

7 October 2013

Feckless In Need

bankers were found short of competence in charge of pension contributions

3 August 2014

Osborne's Recession

For pity's sake Esther, please wear a vest.

23 May2014


Bring powers back to Boris and away from Brussels?

April Fool

comments on Conservative Party YouTube movie disabled

1 April 2014

Ahh! Bush Country?

1 April 2011 

Colonel Gaddafi:  “You take me for a fool. I shall be exiled. Take me to Best Buy”

Hannan, the Deluded

24 November 2012 Whether or not Daniel Hannan, MEP, should be expelled from the Conservative Party.

11 January 2014

Fear of Buying

"They are a bit dry", she said, "Not fresh", she explained.

19 May 2012


High street giant Currys are not honouring Extended Warranty contracts.

Daily Mail

Exploits Manslaughter of Children