Ed Miliband  

Dear Sayeeda,

25 September 2010

We have never met but you seem to know me, perhaps by way of our mutual acquaintance, Mr Cameroon, who used to write to me every week, but has now lost interest in writing to me, or what I have to say to him.

Ed Miliband seems like a nice man, and you know, I think he really wants to be taken seriously.

I like his apparent determination to deal with the bankers, after Brown and Co gave them far too much slack at a time when the Conservatives say they were firmly in favour of not regulating the banks.

I think that is how it happened. I could be wrong. No, I am wrong.

Perhaps you can clear that up for me.

Anyway we now have Ed Millaband to check and balance what the Coalition might do to rebalance the books.

Obviously you would not dare make the poor pay for the mistakes of the bankers, because Mr Maceroon has had another baby and that has made all conservatives cuddly and very cross about what the bankers have done and how they are expected to pay for their babies, without actually paying for their babies, because babies are really  expensive these days.

We don’t want socialism, we just want affordable babies, because after all, there is no profit in having a baby. Babies do not make money until they are really grown up. They are not meant to make money, they are like works of art. OK, I am thinking aloud, but maybe we should have an arts council grant for having a baby.

Sayeeda, do we have any plans to abolish the arts Council? If so, please think again.

I will certainly do my best to spread the word about the hippos. Nice to hear from them once again.

Your very best new friend,

Leslie.

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Dear Leslie,

25 September 2010

On behalf of all of us in the Conservative Party, I congratulate Ed Miliband on his election as Leader of the Labour Party.

He will have many challenges ahead in these next few days, but if he wants to be taken seriously, the first thing he's got to do is own up to his role in creating the mess that Britain is in and tell us what he'd do to fix it.

From advising Gordon Brown in the Treasury in the 90s, to serving in his Cabinet in the 2000s, he must recognise his central role in creating the financial mess we're all paying for.

For the past five months, all we've heard from Labour is knee jerk opposition to our plans to tackle the deficit. Now is the time for Mr Miliband to tell us what he'd do instead. He promised us a Labour spending plan before the spending review, now we'd all like to see it.

The new Labour leader now has a clear choice. He can either serve the national interest by joining with us and the Liberal Democrats and set out how he would cut the deficit, or he can stand on the sidelines and refuse to engage with the biggest challenge facing Britain in decades.

The fact that Ed Miliband owes his position to the votes of the unions does not bode well. At the moment this looks like a great leap backwards for the Labour Party.

After 13 years of Labour failure, we need your help to hold Ed Miliband to account. So please forward this email to your family and friends - and don't forget to follow and share our updates on Facebook and Twitter.

Yours,

Sayeeda Warsi

Co-Chairman of the Conservative Party